


Overflow

by quijeswrites



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Angst and Tragedy, M/M, One Shot, Sad Tsukishima Kei, Short One Shot, Tragedy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-28
Updated: 2020-01-28
Packaged: 2021-02-27 11:20:05
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 558
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22236217
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/quijeswrites/pseuds/quijeswrites
Summary: Imagine what if Tsukishima Kei just broke down one day.Although he may not show it. He feels rather empty. Well, probably emptier than he usually have. Unlike the usual walking empty vessel without something to fill him in, he felt like this very vessel cracked so much that nothing can ever fill him in.And that’s how breaking down felt for him. No tears flowed. Just the emptiness of his soul stared and reflected from a shattered mirror, reminding him that he wouldn’t be normal no matter how much he wanted to. No matter how much he tried to see through his soul.
Relationships: Tsukishima Kei/Yamaguchi Tadashi
Comments: 6
Kudos: 81





	Overflow

**Author's Note:**

> I was rummaging through my old drafts, trying to find motivation and found this, and decided to upload it here. I'm so sorry in advance ;;;;
> 
> Yep this is just sad af lol don't hate me pls
> 
> (my old self must've written this on a whim and must've been through much lol wtf...)
> 
> (not gonna edit this cause I'm cringing at my old self lol)

**IMAGINE WHAT IF** Tsukishima Kei just broke down one day.

That's probably what is happening right now.

Although he may not show it. He feels rather empty. Well, probably emptier than he usually have. Unlike the usual walking empty vessel without something to fill him in, he felt like this very vessel cracked so much that nothing can _ever_ fill him in.

And that’s how breaking down felt for him. No tears flowed. Just the emptiness of his soul stared and reflected from a shattered mirror, reminding him that he wouldn’t be normal no matter how much he wanted to. No matter how much he tried to see through his soul.

Because to begin with, people never treated him as a normal person.

_‘Look, he never cared.’_

_‘How can he even stay as if nothing happened?’_

_‘He’s an emotionless monster.’_

_‘See? He hadn’t even cried.’_

_‘He’s not normal.’_

_‘So pitiable.’_

Sometimes he thought: Is it so bad not to cry? Why do people insist that sadness can only be depicted by crying?

Sometimes he started to believe it. Maybe he’s the one to blame. Maybe indeed it is him who doesn’t understand. Maybe what they say about him were all true. Maybe he is an emotionless freak like everyone says.

His eyes suddenly fell on the photograph standing on his bedside table. A sudden jolt surged through him as if his vessel is still capable of feeling. Of being shattered into more little shards.

Memories started flooding in.

_Back into the playground where Tsukishima and Yamaguchi met._

_Back into the days when both of them laughed as kids._

_Back into the days when he fought the bullies who tried to hurt Yamaguchi._

_Back into the days when he fought with Yamaguchi over inflicting violence and revenge to those bullies._

_Back into the days when Yamaguchi offered to buy him a strawberry shortcake for reconciliation._

_Back into the days when Tsukishima felt as if everyone lied to him, especially his brother, yet Yamaguchi never left his side._

_Back into the days when even though Yamaguchi never played volleyball, he still followed Tsukishima._

_Back into the days when Yamaguchi’s voice resonated into his ears, calling him “Tsukki.”_

_Back into the days when they were once happy._

And that’s how he found the answer.

Because out of all the things he neglected, he denied being happy. He immersed himself in the darkness, clutching as if it were his surviving strings but it just makes him emptier than he should.

He realized, that people cried not because they’re sad; not just because of the absence of happiness. Sometimes they cried because they were aware that they were once happy, but never again. Sometimes they cried because those little things that make them happy are also the things that hurt them, because they knew they could never feel or be with them anymore. Sometimes they cried because the existence of happiness they once knew faded. Forgotten. Gone.

He held the picture as if his life depended on it. He engulfed the memories trying to resurface in his mind. Those happy memories he once neglected; the memories he knew he will never be able to experience once again.

Because the person who made his vessel whole once was already dead. His best friend was dead.

That’s when his tears started flowing down his cheeks.


End file.
